Land of the Grey Nomad

After stocking up on supplies we powered out of Cairns a little after midday, stopping only in Atherton to fuel up. We felt like we were heading outback, so filled up the 95-litre main tank, 50-litre sub tank and the 2x20-litre jerry cans. Sure, this sounds like a lot of fuel, but the car has been averaging 17litres/100km.

Heading west we started shifting from Backpacker territory into the land of the Grey Nomads*. Our first stop was Undara NP, famous for the lava tubes**, with park access is restricted to privately run tours. We decided to stay at the Undara Experience, a little pricy, but a well-kept and clean caravan park. We’d booked the “active tour” over the “archway tour”, not because we wanted to be active but because the other tour seemed to be aimed at the very young or the infirm. 

Easy access

 The tour started at 10:30am, so when we awoke at 7am we thought we had loads of time. However in the end, after eating breakfast, showering and trying to reorganise the car for the millionth time, we had to run to the office not to miss it… of course we did. The office had made a mistake and booked us on the easy tour. Becky tried multiple avenues of complaint, but each time we hit computer says no; the other tour full so it was the archway tour or nothing.

On our tour we had a number of elderly couples near death, two young Swedish families and a young English family. The drive to the cave was quite frustrating as the two youngest Swedish boys yapped the whole way, showing no interest in the guide’s description of the geology and history of the area. The guide was dropping knowledge gold and these four year olds were letting it slip through their fingers. This was a theme throughout the tour, the Swedish kids just showed no interest in the description of how the lava tubes formed or the flora and fauna of the area. The English four-year-old boy piped up when he saw a Brush Turkey, I told him “mate, there fucking everywhere”, but he wouldn’t listen.  There’s just no telling some people!

Lava hole, with a very interesting story about its formation

 The tour was nice, but it was a little overpriced at $58 per person. I mean the kids did have a point; they’re just fucking caves, so who gives a shit how they were formed.

That's a lot of lava

We had lunch after the tour finished and then headed to Kalkani Volcanic Crater. The brochure from the front office made it sound very cool. You take a short walk up to the craters edge then follow the 2km path around the rim. We arrived, a little disheartened by the 500m walk to the craters edge, but spurred on by the promise of the brochure we persisted.

It was SHIIIIIT. I mean, there was an OK view, but the crater was full of trees and could have been anything.

I got dressed for this?

We trudged round the “rim” getting sweaty and annoyed. We saw a kangaroo.

Oh, hello..

He seemed happy to see us:

Kangaroo lipstick

We also saw a wallaby baby and pale-headed rosella… Hardly worth the boob-sweat I had as a result of walking 2km.

I'm not good enough for you?

Who's a pretty boy

Of course, I’m being a little flippant. The whole area was lovely. After a final night, where we cooked up some delicious campsite curry, we packed up and prepared for the big drive to Normanton. Looking back, perhaps we hurried away from this site a little hastily. I think we are still finding an enjoyable pace for the whole journey. For us, the journey is the holiday and the destination unimportant… I’m off to meditate in the morning glow of the outback.

So far the trip has been very enjoyable, despite my constant moaning. Remember, I enjoy having a little complain and this is not a reflection on my happiness. I’d probably be less happy if I had nothing to complain about, and the blog a lot shorter.

*Pensioners who have spunked all their cash on huge motorhomes and caravans.

**Caves formed by lava spewed years ago